I did it! I finished my first 40 day Sadhana.
It’s one of those small things. I want to call it small but doing something for 40 days is not a small thing. It’s huge and yeah it’s fucking huge! I did miss one day right about in the middle so I added a day at the end. I did it 40 times!
In the past I tried this and here is how it went. Decide to do a sadhana. Day 1 everything good. Day two almost forget. Day three oops well I’ll do better tomorrow. Day 4 another oops and that was the end of it. The first several tries all ended in a oops I forgot.
When I saw a colleague Zita offering one I jumped on it. It was a Har meditation which is one of my favorites in the first place. It also works on abundance, money, and prosperity all things I am working very hard to shift right now. I said to myself I am doing this and signed up.
I learned a lot about myself and doing something for 40 days. Resistance didn’t happen in the beginning like I thought it would. There were a few will these 11 minutes ever end, but not a lot of Ego telling me it was dumb. I chose to do 11 minutes the full amount of time for the meditation. I gave myself permission not to be perfect. I was getting over bering sick and relatives were in town I did not make myself do 11 minutes. I did the minimum of three minutes, no guilt, no shame attached.
The closer you are to actually changing the more your Ego resists and finds ways to make you want to stop. About half way through is when the struggle started. I didn’t want to, but I did. I wanted to stop halfway through the meditations, but I didn’t. You have to realize that your Ego is out to protect you and it does not like change, especially big change. I was kind to my Ego but it was not my influencer. I knew if I kept going I would be stronger.
I wish I could tell you that I was radically transformed and it all melted away all my issues. That would be a lie to you and to myself. What all those Hars did do was open me up to more change. I asked that it change me at the cellular level and that I finished the sadhana tells me it did. Doing the work has moved me from one place to another. I know I am not done with money and the connecting issues.
I’ve explored most of myself but money and this area is a new realm for me to delve in. My 40 day sadhana helped me realize that and make a few connections in my head. It also was when my Be the Star of Your Life reading was born.
I also realized that I really missed my 10 minutes of sitting quietly and that the chanting did not replace that. The other shift is doing my second sadhana and doing it in the morning. I’m so not a morning person. That doing anything right away other than coffee is huge.
All the small shifts during my first sadhana are leading to some big changes. Changes which I am very excited to happen and come into my life.